Trying to keep my head up when I feel like the world is against me….

My thoughts overcome me.. All the time.

Sigh. I don’t understand why I can’t feel a sense of contentment and happiness, and why I have this empty feeling.

For the first time ever, I’m really sad about moving. I wish I never made this hasty decision just to accommodate a certain person who’s not even gonna be living with us anymore. Ugh, just thinking about it makes me so mad at myself. I didn’t realize how much I would miss this place. It really feels like home to me and I think it brought me good fortune. This is the place that I’ve been blessed with finally getting a new job and a new car. And this place is right next to my boyfriend AND my best friend.. people who knew better for me. WTF was I so stupid?!?!

For my best bc she’s the only one who understands why it takes me forever to do my nails :)

The more you push me aside, the more I fall out of love. 3

It’s one thing for you to go to a stripclub. I was somewhat trying to be cool with it and it took a lot to calm my nerves because I know it’s your boy’s birthday… BUT SHIT, you just pushed my fucking limit getting a fucking lapdance. You’re not fucking single. I don’t give a fuck if you were coerced to getting one by your boys. You have a mind of your own… And most importantly, you HAVE a girl. HAVE SOME RESPECT! >:o

“Later that day I got to thinking about relationships. There are those that open you up to something new and exotic, those that are old and familiar, those that bring up lots of questions, those that bring you somewhere unexpected, those that bring you far from where you started, and those that bring you back. But the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you can find someone to love the you you love, well, that’s just fabulous.” ~Carrie, Sex & the City

I love this show. All-time favorite :)

My niece graduated pre-k today. She’s soooo cute. I looove her!

…with myself. I think I’m gonna start doing this every month. It’s nice to have some alone time for a few hours, especially when I’m always around people. I had the massage of my life today. It was really soothing and I almost fell asleep. Also got a chemical peel/facial for my pimply face.. This stuff better work dammit. Off to get some beauty sleep. Good night :)

I miss my boyfriend. I miss cuddling with you babe :c

….and us watching how I met your mother lol

Day #9 of working straight. Trying to make up for last week’s sad paycheck. I’m drained but not to the point of dropping dead yet lol. Maybe on wednesday night. I’m sort of getting used to the floor now. I feel more organized and ..calm.

I love you Jesus. Thank you for guiding me in everything I do. You truly are my savior.

*Happy birthday che!